Sleepless
by fannyh
Summary: My take on 'tea and sympathy'. Tonks need some advice, or just a shoulder to cry on. Molly can give her both. Please read and review.


_I don't own Harry Potter_

**Sleepless**

She hesitated for a moment before she knocked three times on the door. The evening was dark around her as the sun had just set behind the mountains. The air was warm and made her feel like she was standing indoors. For a moment she thought about leaving but before she had a chance to she heard Molly's voice behind the door.

"Who is it?"

She sounded frightened and Tonks really couldn't blame her. Everyone had a reason to feel frightened these days; actually Molly Weasley had more reasons then most people. With her entire family involved in the Order, Tonks thought, she had enough of things to worry about without having to hear about her problems. But it was too late to back away from it now.

"Molly, it's just me. Tonks."

She could almost hear Molly's sigh of relief and when she spoke again her voice was much more relaxed.

"Tonks, dear. How nice of you to stop by. I'm going to ask you your question. Just to be safe. It's not that I think that…"

Tonks smiled a little. "It's okay Molly. Fire away."

"How do you look un-morphed?"

Tonks stood quite for a moment before she answered. "Black hair, dark eyes… The Black-look, you know…"

Molly opened the door before Tonks had a chance to finish, or even ask Molly a question of her own. The older women embraced her in a warm hug. "I knew it was you. But with Arthur's promotion and all I figure you can't be too careful. Come in, come in…." She dragged her through the door and into the kitchen. "Sit down, dear. Would you like some tea? I was just making some for myself. Arthur isn't coming home until midnight and I don't seem to be able to go to sleep." She smiled a little.

"Thanks, Molly. Tea would be great." She sat down at the big kitchen table. She could see her own reflection in the window. She looked awful. Her mousy brown hair hung down her shoulders and her eyes looked tired. She sighted, she hadn't been able to morph for over a week now. Ever since… It hurt even to think about it. She swallowed hard.

"Here's your tea, dear." Molly put a big teacup in front of her and woke her from her daydream.

"Thanks." She placed both hands around the cup. Her hands were cold and the warmth from the hot tea soon started to make its way through her fingers.

"So, how is everything?" Molly sat down opposite her; she placed a plate with cookies on the table before she wrapped her hands around a teacup of her own. "I must confess that I have seen you look better. Is everything alright?" Molly looked kindly at her.

Tonks didn't know where to begin. Molly knew about her and Remus breaking up but she hadn't told her, or anyone, the details of what had happened. She hadn't told her about the things he'd said, about the things she'd said. She hadn't told her that she hadn't slept for real since the day he had left, that she actually had trouble breathing. All she had said was that she and Remus no longer was a couple and that he had gone to live undercover with the werewolves. She almost imagined that people thought that _she_ had broken up with him. That she had been the one ending things.

She looked down in her teacup.

"Do you miss him?" Molly's voice made her look up.

"What?"

"Do you miss Remus?" Molly looked her in the eyes; she still had her fingers wrapped around her cup.

Tonks could feel tears burning in her eyes and she swallowed. "I really do."

"It didn't end well, did it?" Molly asked.

Tonks shook her head. "He broke up with me, you know."

"I know."

Tonks looked surprisingly at Molly. "You knew? I thought that you, that everyone, believed that I broke it off with him. Or that it, at least, was something we decided together."

"I can see just by looking at you that you didn't want this to happen. You look miserable…"

"Thanks," Tonks smiled, "always nice to hear."

"You know what I mean. You don't look happy anymore. I haven't seen you laugh since Remus left and I understand that you have some trouble morphing. I never thought I should say this but I miss that pink hair of yours." Molly looked worried; she took a sip of her tea and looked at Tonks, waiting for a reply.

Tonks didn't know what to say. She had trouble morphing, but even if she had been able to she didn't feel like wearing her pink hair; somehow her brown hair reflected her inside. She looked down once again, tried to keep tears from falling. She failed.

"Tonks?" Molly took her hand. "Why don't you tell me about it? It always feels better when you've talked to someone. Please tell me what've happened. Maybe I can help you?"

Tonks could hear that she meant it; Molly always meant whet she said. She would do anything to help.

"He said that I deserved better." She spoke quietly. "He said that he was too old for me, too dangerous and that I deserved someone who could take care of me. He said he was too poor."

Molly continued to hold her hand.

"I love him, you know." She is crying now.

"I know."

"And he said that he loved me." She tried to keep her voice steady.

"I know."

"Then why did he do that? Why did he say all those things?" She looked Molly straight in the eyes, begging her for an answer so that maybe, just maybe, she would be able to get some sleep tonight.

"I don't know, dear."

"He said that he loved me."

"And he does. I am sure of it." Molly sounded confident. "He is just too noble for his own good. He loves you so much that he is willing to let you go in order to protect you from getting hurt. But I know that he loves you, you must never doubt that!"

Tonks shrugged.

"No, Tonks! Never forget that! He loves you and he will come to his senses. I promise you…"

Tonks wiped away the tears from her eyes. "So you don't think I should just move on?"

"Is that what you want?"

Tonks shook her head. "No."

"Then I don't think you should. When you find love, don't let it go. When Arthur and I first meet his mother loathed me. We almost ended things because of her…"

"What happened?" Tonks asked curiously, she hadn't heard this story.

"It's a long story, dear. But the important thing is that we decided to go for it anyway. If you love someone and that person loves you back you have to do everything to make it work." Molly smiled.

"What about Arthur's mother? Does she still loath you?" Tonks had trouble imagine anyone hating Molly Weasley.

"She past away a few years ago but before she died she handed over her secret cookie-recipe to me," Molly pushed the plate a little closer to Tonks, "so I don't think she hates me any more… No, she was a delightful woman and from the moment I married Arthur she became like a second mother to me. Cookie?"

"Thanks." She took a cookie from the plate. "I really should get going." She broke the cookie in two pieces and put one in her mouth.

"Are you sure?" Molly said. "You don't want to stay here for the night?"

The night, Tonks thought, looking down. I hate the night… There is nothing to do if you can't sleep and my bed is too big for just one person. It fitted two just perfectly. She swallowed. She could remember his touch, the way his lips felt against hers…

"Tonks?"

She looked up.

"Are you crying?" Molly sounded worried. "I hate to see you so miserable. Isn't there anything I can do?"

Tonks shook her head, unable to speak. She was cold.

Molly got up and walked over to her side of the table and sat down next to her. Tonks just sat there, not moving or looking at her. Tears were falling from her eyes but she didn't wipe them away. Molly put an arm around her and Tonks let her head rest on her shoulder.

For a while they sat there, side by side. Neither of them spoke but Tonks didn't mind. She enjoyed the silence. Tonks could feel how her head was getting heavier and she had trouble keeping her eyes open. She moved a little and Molly looked at her.

"I really need to get going." Tonks lifted her head from Molly's shoulder.

"You know that you are more then welcome to stay." She got up from the table. "Do you want another one?" She offered Tonks another cookie. Tonks shook her head and Molly walked over to the sink with the plate. "You are always welcome to stay here. And you can always talk to me, I hope you know that."

"I know Molly." Tonks turned around in her chair so that she faced the older witch. "You are an amazing friend. But I think that I need to be alone tonight, I have some things I need to think about." _Maybe I'll even get some sleep_, she added to herself, _Merlin knows, I could need that._

"I hope you will be able to get some sleep." Molly said as if she had read her mind. "You look as if you haven't slept for a week."

Tonks was just about to answer when she was interrupted by a knock on the door.


End file.
